++complicated++

Long time never been update my blog..it's much of the incident happened on tis period..hav happiness..sadness n even angry...but i did try to cover in the short timing..
It was a valentine which i did expect will hav surprise n lovely celebration..but at the end i just had my valentine with my family which spent at cousin's house..did received the rose from him on the day before valentine..i was tried all my best to done my work as soon as possible before 4pm..at the end i did it..i thought before going cousin's house i can hav a great celebration with him..but it's not..he delay..i really very confuse..y normal day he can done his work speedy but on tis special day he cant make it???sometime i really dun know wat he thinking about..
after valentine..v lack to talk with each other..just like in war..i feel hesitate to text him..even half way will stop the conversation...
I did think much on our relationship today..even get opinion from buddy..but still in confuse..i think mayb in complicated is good oso..at least v can concentrate on work n done it fast..but since it hapen..it will effect our relationship..i really headache on those time keep thinking on our problem..as people said..the long u know the people the more u will know from them..
anyone can help me???really complicated...

我也不知道我在想什么

最近真的很无奈，一直弄到他不高兴就连他在烦，我也不知道。。。我们最近很冷谈，冷得我都不知道该怎么回复你发的短信。。。

这一整个星期都和生病一起度过，先是拉肚子后是严重的伤风感冒。那天我生病请假了，很高兴他送上了爱心粥和热腾腾的糖水，虽然胃口不好但我还是坚持两样都有吃。

有时我会觉得情侣间不一定要常见面，常见面反而会觉得腻、很烦。或许我们的想法都不同，所以现在都搞得双方都不愉快，互相在猜测对方到底在想什么。我真的曾经把我的想法告诉他，过后他真的会改过，可是后来过了不久又重犯了。我知道没有人是完美的，当然在他心中我有很多缺点也没有改，我很想改可是我真的办不到。最近他告诉我他最近没钱了，我也不知道该怎么帮他，因为我最近也过得很困难，工作也做得不开心，所以我唯一想到的就是减少我们的约会次数这当然我们的消费也自然会跟着减少。这个也不能当面告诉他，我知道他会接受不到的。烦。。。

每到月尾我都会有股冲动会和你吵架，弄到你不开心。我真的很想知道为什么？？？
为什么我总会在每个月的这个时候想和你吵架、离开你？？？
为什么总是在这个时候我会找出你一罗罗的缺点？？？
为什么在这个时候我就不是我？？？变成另一个人？？？
为什么只是一点小事我就小题大作？？？
为什么我就不能像平时一样？？？

有时我真的很烦，有问题也不知道找谁诉苦。我很想告诉你，可是有些事情告诉你后反而会变严重。我真的想过，如果我们真的结婚了，后果会怎样？？？虽然这个想法很遥远，但是对我而言是个我很想客服困难。总是觉得我不能定下来，一直要自由要做什么就尽管去做也不用理会另一半的感受，这段恋情真的让我投降了。它真的让我真真地去感受何为的谈恋爱？？？何为互相尊重？？？何为不顾一切坚持维持这段恋情？？？

我有时真的很害怕和他说话，他有时真的很凶虽然他说不是但我真的那么认为。他和之前的男朋友真的相差很远，无论是他们的优点或缺点都相差很远。优点-他们不比他好也没有他细心；缺点-他们没有他多也没有他暴躁和没有耐性。

或许如果他看到这篇文章后会再次地说我又伤害他了吧。。。=（

mOOdy~sick :(

Recently i feel like very moody...on job..love & health...

job~:
~> i feel that this job like not really my strength...it needs overturn customer carefully some more has to walk to many shops under hot sun..
~> i did agree that it gives lot of income even time is very flexible..but i understand that it doesnt what im looking for..
~> it was 5th day im working here..but i still feel strange with my colleague..they not even come and talk with me..like not friendly..maybe it's cause of im quiet and they dont feel like want to talk to me???

love~:
~> these days i feel like im easy angry on him even it's a small method but i will thought it as a big issue..
~> i starting care on his outlook even feel like want to change for him..i know it's bad but i really feel like want to do that..
~> mummy still keep scolding me while she knows that im hanging out with him..even keep scold me fat and she dont likes fats..i really have no idea how im going to tell him even thought i did told him on it before and he seen like try to change with do exercise at first but now like did stop it..
~> sometimes he use to raise up his voice on me without realization even it's not my fault and he always follow him own opinion hard to accept on what others saying..

health~:
~> these days i keep having heahache..i think it's cause of whole day long been heat at outside and mix with the cool in car..
~> i did received a free treatment at London Weight Management as i joined it but haven paid all of the course..during the consultation i did realize that i was put much on weight as the highest i never had before..much of my skin problems are cause of my fat too..i even are not normal and too fat now..at the moment im really sad and did made the decision of join the course..but i never tell anyone on it..even for him..i also dont know how im going to tell him..as now i have eat simple and light foods only..
~> i feel like very emotion which i was never went for "big business" for 2 days long..i exactly can feel much of toxin in my stomach and hanging around..

i really hope that i can settle all of this problem as soon as possible..

florence..nothing is impossible..U CAN DO IT!!!

得不到的东西永远都是最珍贵的

人很奇怪的，太容易得到的东西都不会珍惜但一旦失去了才晓得它的可贵。就像当你常常见到一个人，你不会想说如果有一天你再也见不到他或是大家都太忙没机会在碰面了，很自然的就不会珍惜大家相处的欢乐时光。

本来我都不太明白这个道理，直到最近我开始工作时间也比较充足当然也是相当的累，所以没有天天见2号。以前天天和他出去约会时，我承认我有时会觉得很不耐烦甚至他说的每一句话我都不想听也不怎么会正式去爱他和关心他，直到最近我们见面的次数减少了可是我却发现我更加地爱他和关心他，介意他对我说的每一句话，当然也会一直想念他。这大概就是所谓的得不到的东西反而会更加珍惜吧。

有时也在想爱情的过程中也必须慢慢地去栽培以便种出一棵幸福的树苗。在慢慢的过程中当然大家也会比较了解对方，而不是因为在对方身上想得到什么利益而去做；如果是为了利益的话，谈恋爱岂不是在浪费双方的时间吗？那当初又何必在一起呢？？？回想到以前我真的很后悔，都因为心软而接受追求者的追求而浪费了我那么多的时间和别人的真心，不过从他们的身上也看清很多关于男生的事和性格。

在接下来的日子里我珍惜我现在所拥有的。谢谢你对我所做的一切，尤其是你的包容、细心和付出，我相信我们一定会一起克服各种的困难和分享所有的快乐的。。。^^

~~~14.9.2010~~~

这一天是我正式接受2号的日子。。。

今天是我们一起1个月又两个星期

我们曾经冷战两次（都是我引起的）无可否认地，和你一起是幸福的而你也相当地迁就我。在我心中你是特别的，虽然有很多缺点，但是你的优点却胜于它。。。
优点：
～愿意为了我改掉所有我不喜欢的缺点
～为了我们的将来设定8年的计划
～无论发生什么事，你都是第一个低头的
～从以前不喜欢长毛的动物直到现在愿意接受我的Hugo
～我说的每一句话，你没有一句是不记得的
～常常费心地计划我们的约会
～只要我不舒服，你都会很紧张很关心我
～从来不勉强我不愿意做的事
～愿意牺牲与兄弟的时间，把你所有的时间都放在我身上
～有上进心，会为未来打算
～对爱情专一
～无论我遇到什么难题都会主动第一个帮我
～不会注重外表，喜欢自然的我
～常常会注意我的小细节
～有点大男人主义但不过分
～常常会给我很多的惊喜也会为我准备意想不到的事
～了解我喜欢和不喜欢的东西和事情
～当然还有很多很多的。。。
我永远都不会忘记在23.09.2010这一天倒数生日会你所为我准备的一切，这一天是我人生第一次收到一束很特别的花（13朵粉红玫瑰）、一个你为特定的生日蛋糕和一对“你挂着我，我挂着你”。
虽然你不是完美的，但在我心目中这已经足够了。我相信我们在未来的日子里会一起度过无数的每一天和14号，任何的阻碍都阻挡不了我们，只要那一天我们依然相信彼此。

my ear......my future.......

Wearing almost 8 hrs of headset since mon to fri...recently i really feel that my ears going to face problem soon...
-i cant hear really clear on others
-feel ears pain when it's huge noise surrounding me
-when someone talking behind me..i cant concentrate even continue in my conversation who i exactly talking to
-feel headset vibrate me somewhile i wearing the headset
-sometimes feel like wanna remove all the sound away from me
now i really like my job much..but it's destroy my hearing sense...mommy keep asking me to resign too...i feel really confuse on my future..really hav no idea if i resign then wat job should i look for...
but health is really important..without it we cant do anything too...but i feel really sorry to my team leader who recruited me and as wat i had promised her tat i will for at least 1 year...
guan yin...can u help me???please tell me wat should i do...=(

最近的我???

真的很久很久没有更新我的部落格的...最近的生活有起伏..有些说不上的烦恼...
工作~
不知不觉中..经姐妹介绍到这间公司上班已经3个月了..也收到肯定信了..还蛮开心的..宁..谢谢你哦..^^不过我最近也到或许我不会长久待在这间公司..毕竟长期戴着耳机说话对耳朵甚至是健康会有影响的...但是在这里工作的确很开心..没有太多的人事问题而且各个都对我很好..甚至可以说是疼爱有加...在这里向他们学习了很多东西(也少不了人生道理^^)...可是我可能将会从事记者的工作(这样就不会浪费我上的课程和文凭)..所以现在都在烦恼..不过还是必须通过面试后再作最后的打算..=(
爱情~
最近大概都在走桃花运吧..当然也少不了烂桃花咯..哈哈..不过确实有一个男生是不错的..其实从一开始就对他有好印象..多亏那班朋友常常在我面前说他的好..导致我弄假成真..大概是慢慢爱上他了吧...一个被动..文静..有点大男人..可是却细心..体贴..有男人风度的男人...这次我是不会冲动了..我会慢慢了解他在决定(虽然他们都说我中毒很深了^^)...
友情~
觉得姐妹情会慢慢陌生..疏远的..友情是必须经由大家互相保温才能把它维持在一定的温度..甚至是加温...想念从前的我们...一起上课..看电影..购物..逛夜市..用餐..享受贵夫下午茶..聊聊彼此的喜怒哀乐..等等...现在在短期内毕竟是不会实现了...我必须去买个保温瓶或热水瓶把我们的友情装进去保温和加温...
最近宝贝儿子HUGO和我都是形影不离..导致很多人都说我们的样貌很想...现在就连睡觉我们都是同床的...已经习惯了对方的存在...希望和HUGO在一起的时刻一直到永远...
PS:将来我的男朋友或老公也一定要很疼爱HUGO的哦...嘻嘻..^^